Dating is like walking on a thin ice. You are being watch every move you make and every breath you take. It takes not only courage but also skills for a guy to ask a girl out on a date, Dating can be casual these days in Japan where a boy or a girl might date with multiple partners at the same time. Now a days, girls might do this more often than guys which was unheard of 20 years ago.
Despite westernization in Japan, it is still strongly believed that guys should make the first move. No matter what cultural back ground you have, as you might already know the most important factor to make a girl say ‘yes’ to a date, is the way the girl is approached.
6 mistakes guys make when talking to girls
Many guys make mistakes when asking a girl out, which makes the girls turn down the offer, ending the relationship even before it started. Some mistakes guys make are
# 1 some guys are very nervous, and get a friend to do the asking (you might have seen this is Japanese anime)
# 2 some guys make the mistake of asking a girl in front of her friends or a group (just like many other things. Choose the right place and the right timing)
# 3 many guys make the mistake of asking a girl out before knowing her enough. A girl would definitely like to know the guy well before deciding to go out with him. “Trust” is an important factor in a good relationship. (This has happened to a LoveinJapanese.net staff. Trust us, girls are watching closely and they notice this)
# 4 some guys don’t bother about the way they look (DO NOT MAKE THIS MISTAKE!)
# 5 some guys keep on persisting a girl in spite of her saying ‘no’. (Be a gentle man. Just move on)
#6 some guys don’t plan properly. (Planning makes 80% of asking a girl out)
What are the right things to do then?
These are some mistakes that guys make, and if you want to ask a woman on a date the right way, try to avoid making any mistake. So if you are longing for a successful date and relationship, let’s see what you should do?
- First of all you should try to attract the girl. Unless the girl gets attracted to you, she would not like to go out with you.
- Avoid asking; instead invite her out for a walk, coffee or ice-cream. Avoid movies or dinner in your first date.
- Take care of your personal appearance; don’t look shabby and make sure you smell good. Remember girls like their guy to look handsome and attractive.
- Be well planned, but don’t make it too complicated
- Don’t be shy and nervous. Be bold and confident when approaching a girl.
- Make your invitation casual, not desperate. Be humorous. Don’t take it too seriously.
- Take time to understand the girl, and become very friendly with her, before asking her out. Try to be caring and try to be helpful and supportive whenever she needs.
Books to help you learn how to talk to girls
What about Japanese girls?
Many foreigners love to date Japanese women. One reason for this is that they are very beautiful, cute, and mysterious at the same time. They give importance to their culture and women are raised to respect guys and they are very happy to serve him and take care of him. They are also very obedient (to some extend. Thanks to westernization, this is not 100% true anymore). They are very attractive and have strong feminine traits.
If you are planning to approach a Japanese girl, there are few things you have to keep in mind.
- Make sure you are aware of Japanese culture.
- Knowing a bit of Japanese language will be an advantage and show them that you are a good match for them (if you are a foreigner).
- Japanese women are very choosy, so make sure that she is really interested in going out with you.
- Be a real gentlemen and pay attention to all her needs – but don’t set the bar too high. It will be difficult for you to match the expectation moving forward.
- Keep listening to whatever she says, because Japanese women love men to listen to them (well, not just Japanese women actually).
- Japanese girls love going to restaurants. Avoid taking them to a Japanese restaurant, because most of them prefer European dishes. Unless of course if you guys meet outside Japan, she might be home sick and want some Japanese food.
- Pay attention to how you look. (Can’t say enough about this. Make yourself look good!)
- And finally, if you are serious about the relationship, get her father’s approval, because Japanese women cherish her father’s opinion. So make sure you impress her father too.
Western or Asian, whatever it may be, women are romantic and loved to be approached and believing in yourself and using the right technique will help you to win over a girl easily.